by: Grant Photography - Evin

Thursday, November 29, 2007

The Days Ahead...


So at work....don't get me wrong...I love my job. Often time I just feel the work presented to me is overly simple. (and it has nothing to do with my degree)

Yes I am a recent college graduate, and I have a fairly good job to have just gotten out of college. Yet I revert to things as this. Writing notes.

I don't want a new job as of yet. I'm content with this one, and with the addition of this new rent, making less than what I make now is below me. Not trying to sound all high and mighty, I just have standards.

So a lot is going on in my life that I am thankful for, but it is far from perfect. There are still things missing, those that have gone away and those I'm awaiting to acquire.

I see the days ahead as being rough times, and it's not the challenges awaiting me that I worry about. It’s the fact of facing them alone that has me anxious.

I'm often tired, even when I sleep for long periods of time. I'm never truly satisfied with what I'm doing...or have done for that matter. I feel empty, yet I know not of what it is I seek or need.

I'm not looking for anything in particular...just fulfillment. The past 4 years of college have been a lot 360 transformation for me. I came in young, fun, long hair, full of nothing. Now the knowledge and experience I have gained has put me beyond where I ever imagined to be...and I often look at things as though I'm beyond that. Not as if I'm conceited, just as though I've come to far to reduce myself to something less than what I am promised in life.

Yet I do not know of what it is I'm promised. I enjoy where I'm at, but I feel there is more...there has to be because as of now I feel that I have so little. Though I'm blessed, my cup overflows, but I still feel hunger.

What am I missing to fulfill the void in my life? What has been "void"?