by: Grant Photography - Evin

Monday, June 23, 2008

When We Can't Understand...

Often we are faced with issues in life that seem too much to comprehend. Situations at work, at home, or even strange happenings out in the world. Whether it seems too good to be true, or too bad to be good. But how do we deal with them? In a world of unpredictability, what can we do to maintain a grasp on things that we don't understand why they are happening?

The reason I've come to ask this question, is because often I am faced with answering questions that I don't know the answer to, but I know what the "asker" needs to hear. Just this past weekend alone, 3-4 different friends came to me in order to seek guidance and understanding (wisdom) from me. Mostly to do with relationships (cause I'm the bomb when it comes to understanding them, I just struggle with them myself, maybe that's why I know what NOT to do, and what SHOULD be done). I don't charge anything if you need relationship help, so holla at me, I think my mom does charge for her counseling, but she works for the church, I work for...well to help, because so many have freely helped me.

Beyond that, how do I understand? How am I able to deal with the issues of others, but they can't deal with it. Why is it so easy for me to understand things I don't know, and others can't seem to understand things right in front of them. (Whats sad, I often don't understand why things happen in my own life. I know how to deal with them, but I don't understand what caused them, whether good or bad, great or terrible).

And maybe that is what a lot of people struggle with. When they can't understand why, they don't care to deal with issues. They rather pass them off as though the issues will mysteriously go away. Maybe when we can't understand, it's not meant for us to understand, it is meant for us to learn how to take action when things seem out of hand.

Instead of crying and whining, seek guidance, find someone who has dealt with the issue, read about the issue, etc. When we can't understand we have a tendency to give up on caring, then we enter a state where we can no longer function because something is hanging over our head. Or if something seems too good, instead of enjoying it, we spend time in question, asking if the feeling is true. If it is possible to be this happy. Instead of being grateful, appreciative, and enjoying the moments of greatness, we question whether or not it is true that things can be this wonderful.

When you can't understand why something is, pray to understand how to deal with it. Too many of us want to know the answer to "why?". That's not the important question, we don't affect life from understanding "why", we change based on the action we take in response to "why". Understand why may come through the action you take in dealing with the issue. Eventually, "why" will be relieved to you, so that you can understand, but when you don't understand why from the beginning, don't worry about it. Deal with it and move on. You may never have to deal with the issue ever again. It may be a situation where you are meant to be, and instead of trying to understand why for 30 years, take the time to make sure it is a good 30 years rather than a confused 30 years.

So when you don't understand, don't quiver in fear because its "strange" or "hard" or "different" or "too good", stop and think about what you can do to take control and be a part of what is going on. You don't want to understand why things are bad or if they are too good, because you are giving the negativity to much attention when you dwell on trying to figure out why. Spend time fixing the problem so you can enjoy more time in happiness rather than in confusion, pain, or suffering.

God Bless

P.S. Do know that as much "WISDOM" as I may have, I often don't understand things myself. Things in my own life. I want to figure them out, but I rather take action and control the issue myself. I don't have the time in life to ponder why this issue is bad, or why, at this moment in life, everything is WONDERFUL. I don't care why. Why? Because God said so, and that's a good enough reason for me. I've stopped trying to understand WHY, and understand HOW this is effecting me, and WHAT I can do about it. If its bad fix it, if it's good take the most out of it. Believe me, I am in some good times and I will not trade them for the world. I think I know why, but I'm not going to spend my day trying to understand why, I'm going to enjoy it and things will be relieved to me when life thinks I can handle the answer.

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